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Thursday, April 17, 2008

April 17, 2008

We received a call yesterday from our surrogate that she was having contractions and heading to the hospital, so Nick already flew out to San Diego to be nearby. They ended up stopping the contractions and gave her a steroid to speed the lung development of the babies in anticipation of delivery within seven days. They sent her home and some decision is supposed to be made tomorrow as to whether they think it’s time for birth or not. If so, the plan is that I’ll fly out for the birth and then return home the following day. Nick can work from San Diego while I cannot, and I need to save my vacation for when they come home. The doctor said they should be in the NICU a minimum of seven days, so I’ll fly back out to help Nick bring the boys home. But then birth could be quick, meaning I’ll miss it. I’ll be upset if I miss it, but it’s not the end of the world. I’ll bond as soon as I see them, but I’ve always wanted to be there for that once-in-a-lifetime event.

My head was spinning today, and I continued my attempt at preparing the nest here at home. It seems like everyone’s giving me advice and words of encouragement. I’ve received contradictory advice on diapers though. “Huggies. You’ve got to use them”. “Get Luvs – they’re the only ones that prevent blow outs”. “Get the Costco brand. They’re just as good and half the price”. OK, I’ve decided diapers are like buying jeans. You have to try on 15 different cuts and brands before you find a pair that fit you perfect and make your ass look good!

I received a copy of Details magazine today and it had an article titled, “The Gay Baby Boom”. I guess Details knows who butters their bread! I found it interesting that they said single gay men who adopt or have a baby via surrogate and egg donor find that having a baby makes them more attractive in the dating scene. I would have thought the opposite, but it said gay men with a child are seen as more stable.

If the birth isn’t scheduled for Saturday, then, as a neighbor suggested, I should do something tomorrow I won’t be able to do for a long time. Maybe a pedicure? Go out to lunch and read a magazine? Rid the house of wine? It’s supposed to be a beautiful, warm day so maybe I’ll take the dog to Petsmart (she goes nuts) and a nice, long walk in the park.


Marna said...

How exciting for you - and congratulations on becoming a Dad:)
Your life as you know it will totally change once your children come home -- take it from one who knows:) We used pampers for newborns, huggies caused our son to break out. So yes, if you know when the birth is scheduled, get some much needed sleep, get a pedicure and heck even a manicure,don't throw out the wine you will need a much needed glass after the end of a very long day with two babies. Do you both have help or you going to do this all on your own? I am really happy for you, new babies are amazing:)

If you need help or support there's a great organization out there: we have a blog


GayDad said...

Thanks! We'll have one grandmother coming to help for a while and we have plenty of helpful neighbors with kids/babies when we have questions. Some of the twin parents said they had to hire a night nurse so they could get some sleep, so that may be something we have to do. We'll see.

Yeah,I've been told a little wine takes the edge off at the end of the day!

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