This and That

I know, it's been a while! Summer is busy, and I feel like every moment of every day is consumed.

Nick gave me air miles to take a needed break, so I spent five days back in California visiting old friends and neighbors. The best part... I got to sleep nine hours each night! It seemed odd to be carefree and off schedule, but I enjoyed the time away.

My unemployment benefits stopped a month ago, but they're supposed to start back up since Congress finally passed the latest extension. They really keep you in the dark on these benefits, and I didn't even know I was at the end of my first extension. I know people who have been on unemployment for two years, so I was a little surprised to have benefits stop after only nine months. Anyway, my extension is good through sometime in November, and I'm guessing there probably won't be any more extensions, or at least won't count on it. The last resort will be to get the boys in some sort of daycare before November and I go register with every job agency in town and take any job I can get. The alternative would be financial ruin for me! I've had a couple good interviews recently, but neither one has resulted in a job offer yet. One was a Federal job, and they can take months to actually get the offer. I try to calm my anxiety and have faith that everything will fall into place, but no matter what happens, there will be huge adjustments. Getting back into spending my days at work sounds daunting, although I think I need the mental stimulation. Putting the boys in daycare is another worry for me and cause of anxiety. I hate the idea of it, but I know plenty of people who use daycare and everyone adjusts and survives.

The boys keep growing, learning, fighting, and surprising me . Reid is saying new things almost daily, and Dylan finally started spouting off words here and there. The nice thing is that they can ask for things once in a while rather than crying and whining. We're working on ABCs and numbers too. Reid still gets into everything, and every time he makes another mess, I wonder when he'll grow out of this.

It's been hot here, so outdoor activities have been limited to evenings for the most part. We've been to museums and a few indoor activities, and tomorrow, we're riding the rails. They love trains, and loved the little train at the zoo, so tomorrow morning we're taking the light rail train out to a suburban mall. I think they'll enjoy riding a real train, and it's cheap entertainment!

One thing I've noticed in our neighborhood is that many of the stay at home moms seem to have their cliques, and I don't fit into them. I'm not taking offense to that, but being a gay stay at home parent can be rather lonely at times. Really, what do I have in common with these women, outside of parenting? I've been meaning to reach out to our gay dad friends to get together because it just seems more natural to be around them. When you're dealing with two-year-old twins, time seems to get away and it's easy to end up not being very social. I think I've become a bit depressed, partially due to the job situation, but also just feeling lonely, so I need to make more effort to schedule social time of some sort.

The boys like the pool, but they love the fountains at a nearby park more, so that's another evening activity we've taken up for hot nights. The weekend before last, our air conditioner went out and it was over 100 degrees, so we had to find some way to cool down. I'd forgotten about these fountains that were installed just for the purpose of play.